Because I can’t. I mean, the this one‘s built like a moose, but it’s colored like a paint horse—a shetland, maybe, or a wild horse with a winter coat:

It’s definitely not a horse, though. Look at those hind legs.

And this one‘s . . . maybe a white raccoon? The legendary ghost coon?

Whatever it is, I saw something a lot like it one night in West Texas, eating on a deer carcass: pale, used sort-of hands, sat up on its hind legs. Watched me roll past at th…

Living and dying by Magnum PI growing up, I of course fell head over heels for this color scheme:

However, helicopters being far from any reality I knew, and trucks being ALL of my reality, I of course, then, wanted a truck with that color scheme, as Ford was doing in the late seventies:

Is that not baddest truck? Well, except for this one, which I think is a modified version of that—different wheels and tires, the color scheme kind of made louder:

Anyway, yes, I still do dream abou…

Hey, this tweet got enough hearts that, were it Link, he’d now be functionally immortal. But I guess this is A link, anyway:

Anyway, yes, I subscribe to that philosophy. It’s a big reason I have so many scars, so many injuries, why I’m on so many daily pills in these my creaky years. Doesn’t stop me from collecting more scars and injuries, tho…

Man, looks like I’m just embedding tweets here all day—I did just wrap an extensive novel rewrite about five minutes ago—but, here’s another one, a good one, an important one:

Oh, and while I DID once somehow embe…

Tom Paris, saying aloud the creed I live by, pretty much. And? This is my only persistent problem with intergalactic humans in stories: they always come out of warp at some Mos Eisley of a truckstop and just eat whatever’s being served. I can’t help but think that would be instant death. Not just of the soul, but the gut, since no way can we have the proper enzymes to digest some vending machine egg-salad fossil from another solar system.

Also, while I’m postin…

is the author of 22 or 23 books, 250+ stories, and all this stuff here. He lives in Boulder, Colorado, and has a few broken-down old trucks, one PhD, and way too many boots