Seven Things I Learned Today

from trying on just a whole lot of women’s clothes:

1) While I can wiggle into 9/10 pants or slacks, 11/12 is a lot more comfortable.

2) Extra-large in a blouse isn’t even a large in men’s sizes.

3) People will watch you, if you carry enough blouses and pants suits into the dressing room.

3b) That makes it better, really.

4) Even when I’ve got them on, still, women’s clothes are hard to get into.

5) Stretch pants are the answer. Reason: they’re so much easier to (not) button backwards. And, if you can find one with rhinestone (see: ‘dazzle‘), then you’re really going places*.

5b) Stirrups, however, are not the answer.

6) Girl belts are endlessly complicated. Especially fancy ones from the eighties. But this is no reason not to buy them.

7) Blouse fabrics are so much more excellent than the leftovers guys get. And billowy see-through sleeves are the best invention ever.

* like, trick or treating.

Author: SGJ