You know that old Who song “Squeeze Box” — Momma’s Got a Squeeze Box / Daddy Never Sleeps at Night? Pretty sure it would apply nearly* perfectly to me, if I had this contraption:
* why ‘nearly’? I kind of halfway suspect there might be some sexual connoting going on in those lyrics, that I don’t think would apply to me and this contraption. but who knows. or: Who** knows . . .